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Do you have problems in your relations? How to improve your relationship

If things going not that way you want and you sexual or communicative aspect of your relations reached a deadlock you will need to do something with this. First of all try to answer simple questions like
What exactly do want from this relationship? What was your idea about perfect relationship and what you have got?
Do you want to stay with your partner? Do you want to be together because you enjoy this living?

Do you feel ability and wish you improve relationship and work on it again?

Who is guilty? Do not put this question please. Because in ruining of relationship both are guilty. Always. So stop to blame each other first. If you have relations you both are responsible for it. Next step will be acceptance of the fact that you have problems and should work on them together. In short any relationship is daily hard working. But the same time this kind of “job” does have many positive moments.

How can you improve your relationship?

First of all, in today’s very busy, modern world, you always need to find time for each other. You need to look at your joint schedules and find time when you can be together. This is not easy if you both have separate, hectic careers. It becomes even more difficult when you have children.

Sex is not the main aspect of relations but the same time this is very important aspect. With time couple can complain that they do not make love as often as before. It is quite normal. First was passion and as we all know passion is not endless. The reason of decrease of the frequency love acts is simple tiredness at work. When your partner says :’”I am tired , I have had a hard day” you better believe him or her first.
As time goes by people become more demanding to each other though they still no, better to say already know what they need to do to get “good” and what leads to “bad”.
Loss of libido also can be interpreted as unwillingness to make love because this is inside and deep feeling of revenge because of number resentments. All these resentments can be collected with time and the reason they arise is showing no more respect to each other. There is one Chinese proverb: treat your partner as if he was your guest. Wise, isn’t it? We pay great respect to welcome guests so why do not we treat our partner the same way?

Always remember that your partner is your own choice. Could you choose another man or woman? Answer is: Yes? You could. But you have what you have. Respect yourself and do not blame your own choice. Never.

Very often people may insult each other and give up in making efforts with each other. It is not that difficult to be polite, have kind attitude and understanding for each other.
It is more disrespectful when partners become demanding to each other and make a principle stand. This easily could become a habit. Though this is bad habit which could damage relationship. And please never tell your partner what is his problem. He/she knows problems causing with them.

This is a war in some degree. Are you a warrior? Is your couple of enemies? Than it is strange that you sitting the same table when you have a dinner, you share the same bad with this person. Isn’t there any contradiction?

Lack of respect can also be shown in appearances in some cases. It is very sad that couples often stop making an effort with how they look. A small thing like changing clothes colors for something brighter or more glamorous in time for dinner – and the woman putting on some make-up, wear a new perfumes and the man bothering to have a shave – can transform a routine evening into more of an occasion. Try it some day soon or maybe tonight and you will see that your, his or her eyes sparkle. And you know this sparkle very well. You missed it very much.

If there is a problem concerning you both than you should discuss it together. It is not that easy but possible. Try to play one game – rule of 10 minutes. How to play? Easily. One partner listens to another with no interruption for 10 minutes. Teller may tell anything he/she wants. After time is up teller thanks the listener for his/her attention.

And another piece of advice - never let your discussion go on for more than an hour. If you both know that you have limited time you will be more concise.

But is there anything else?

Try to have one evening out per week, just the two of you. If you have children this is more difficult to arrange – but it is not impossible. And do try when you have this so-called ‘date’ to avoid talking about your offspring or your work.

Take a short break from each other. For ladies this gives an opportunity to feel sexier even if the holidays last for couple days.
Make a small party or barbeque with your old friends. When you come together, chatter this will remind you the time when you were younger and also brings pleasant moments and may reshresh some feelings.

Apparently, if your relationship is in real trouble and none of the above suggestions help significantly, you might want to consider having some relationship therapy.

How to be with of improvement of sexual aspect of relations?
If a woman becomes irritable and aggressive in relationship this also will make man to loose interest in sex with her. The same happens if she continues to complain and reproach him that he does not help her on housekeep. Woman also can loose interest in sex if she does not hear love words from her man.

It is not that difficult to say: I love you, I need your help, I liked when you looked at me the way you did when you were making the bed, for example etc. remark and the main thing – outspeak what you have just noticed about your partner.

Having done that could help partners to improve their relation and as a result sexual aspect of relations.

You might suggest being active by turns: one night your lady is a leader and next will be your turn.
Every one of you has own sex fantasies that may turn you on and this could bring some fresh sensations.
If you are fine with such style you could watch porn together or read some exciting stories to each other.
You could play role games. There are many examples of those. But please take into consideration that after those games you need some time (a few hours) to be apart from each other. You need this not to get used to this.

Open for you and your partner sex toys or change the style of your lingerie. Nowadays there are many types, magazines that could help you to find out more about sex. This will help you to have a look at yourself from this side firstly. When you change something in the way of thinking you could change the situation.
If you think that sex life is going down with your partner and you have tried many ways to improve it, it is better to get an advice from sex therapist.

If you have decided to visit a doctor which main area is sex dysfunctions make sure that this is a qualified doctor with many years of experience.
Read this article with your partner, face the problem and make the list of aspects ruining you relations. If you have a desire to save this relationship than you will have to be ready to face things, be more critical to yourself but not to your partner. Remember that patient attitude and readiness to accept things have helped many people. Also remember that you are not the only people having problems in their relations. Try to solve the problem on your own first and if it does not help – go to therapist, read special literature.

You need to rebuild trust to each other too – so please realize that things are unlikely to improve immediately. These things take time, but are well worth working at.


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